Page 13 - Boca Exposure - September '24

Boca Exposure, Page 13
Book Review

The Official Dictionary Of Sarcasm: Society. (Yes, there really is such The inclusion of the word

A Lexicon For Those Of Us Who a group!) Compact in size (6” x “Ultimate” in the title of The Ultimate
7”), this 370-page well-crafted
Book of Useless Information refers
Are Better And Smarter Than The hardcover book is surprisingly to the fact that there was an earlier
version, which made it to The New
heavy – in weight, not in tone.
Rest Of You And The Ultimate Book The author’s sarcastic humor York Times bestseller list. That’s
Of Useless Information: A Few begins on the front cover with the easy to understand when you start
laughing through the 215 pages that
notation: “Not Approved for Use
Thousand More Things You Might by Stupid People” … and on the are arranged in 15 chapters with such
headings as: There’s No Business
back cover makes his point: “You
Need To Know have been waiting patiently for a Like; Words of Wisdom; Food Fight;
dictionary like this to come along. And now it is here … Not
I Wanna Sex You Up; Seeing the
(But Probably Don’t) that you give a crap.” World; Creativity Corner … and so on – offering more than
Of course, the heart of the book is in the more than 350 1,500 true facts which, as the author states, prove once again
By Nils A. Shapiro pages of definitions, almost every one illustrated and printed that “knowledge doesn’t have to be useful to be entertaining.”
You have two books in two colors. Here are just a few examples: Here is a small sampling:
for the price of one in this Power Lunch: A strategic session of manipulation and • Peanuts are one of the ingredients in dynamite.
month’s column. And since preparation for eventual backstabbing arranged around a • The average person spends two weeks of their life kissing.
you receive this newspaper for pleasant noontime meal. • Giraffes have no vocal cords.
free the following review is Hard Working: Conscientious behavior of the kind • 83 percent of people hit by lightning are men.
certainly worth the price. (My usually exhibited by a sap who doesn’t understand that no • When female elephants have been pregnant for more
feeble attempt at sarcasm.) one is going to thank him for it. than 20 months and are still not in labor they will travel a
These books are perfect Kosher: 1. Food that conforms to Jewish nutritional hundred miles searching for the leaves of the Boraginacae
examples of my lifetime laws, which were handed down by God in order that the tree – which can also induce birth in humans.
obsession as a bibliophile. Chosen People would never experience flavor. 2. Also used • Sylvester Stallone used to sweep the lion cages in New
Books have always been my as a generic term to imply legitimacy. “I know most people York City’s Central Park Zoo to pay his way while trying to
favorite source of information, knowledge and information. don’t sell stereo equipment out of the back of a panel van, break into acting.
Even today I seek out titles of interest wherever I shop, from but don’t worry, it’s strictly kosher.” • Although Ohio is listed as the 17th state in the United
big box supermarkets that stack books on tables to furniture Waistline: The part of the human body that we get the most States, it is technically number 47. Until Aug. 7, 1953,
stores that don’t sell books at all. obsessive about keeping trim, if only to remain desirable enough Congress forgot to vote on a resolution to admit Ohio to the
Readers of this column may remember my review of so activity occurring below it will still be a viable option. Union.
Wise Trees, a lavish, oversized photo-filled “coffee-table” Contractor: A person who has the ability to make • Horses race clockwise in England and counterclockwise
volume that was on display in a furniture store – not for February turn into May, May into August, August into in the United States.
sale but to draw attention to a high-quality sofa grouping. I November, and so on. • For religious reasons Franklin Pierce was the only
convinced the owner to sell the book to me and it is now a ***** president to say, “I promise” instead of “I swear” at his
prized possession. If spreading your newfound sarcastic wit at parties inauguration.
This month’s two books are recent additions I couldn’t and other occasions hasn’t yet made you the most popular • Seventy percent of Swedish women claim to have
resist because their subject matter is just so much fun! And person in your group, it turns out that there is another strange participated in a threesome.
since I base my selection of books to review here largely on organization that might help do the trick. In 1995 a group of • “Well, I’ve played everything but a harp.” – Actor John
what I feel you would enjoy – and would want to share with “thinkers, writers and artists” in Britain got together to form Barrymore’s last words, on his deathbed.
friends and family – I am bringing both to your attention here. The Useless Information Society. Today they have 30 members Come on, lighten up. Get both of these books and share
The Official Dictionary of Sarcasm is the work of James – their names are listed in a front page of this book – and the them with others. You are going to need them to make it
Napoli, executive vice president of the National Sarcasm Chairman, Noel Botham, is listed as the author of this book. through the rest of this election year.

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